Letters To You
by codegeassvampireknight
Summary: One year after Lelouch's death, C.C. writes him a letter. In this, she reveals the content of her final conversation with him. In not only this letter, but in their talk, her true feelings come out. R&R PLEASE!


_Dear Lelouch,_

_It's been exactly one year since your death. A lot's changed because of you. As you predicted, all of the world's hatred has been thrust upon you, so now that you're dead, everyone's been able to move on with their lives. All wars that were going on in other areas in the world were put to a stop as soon as possible. Because Cornelia had given up all of her political power and such and Schneizel's under the power of your Geass (it turns out your Geass was powerful enough to STILL be in effect even after your death), Nunnally became the empress of Britannia. She may not have been the oldest, but it was decided that she was not only the most deserving of it, but she was also the most fit. She's done a great job of keeping the world in order. It took a while for the world to accept her as empress, but now she's loved by people all around the world._

_The others are doing well, too. Suzaku has been living as Zero, acting as Nunnally's advisor. No one knows his true identity, just as you two planned. No one knows where Cornelia disappeared to, but it's often believed that she left for the homeland to be with Gilford. Kallen, Rivalz, Nina, and Gino are all attending school again. Jeremiah and Anya live on an orange farm, now. Ironic, isn't it; how Jeremiah was known as Orange Boy for most of the rebellion and now he works on an orange farm? As for me...well, that's another subject._

_Only a few days after your death, I packed up my bags and moved to Australia. Do you remember how Mao said that he had built a big white house in Australia for me and him? Well, I found it out in the country and I moved into it. It's a big house, so it's very lonely because its only occupants are Cheese-Kun and I. I only get visits from the pizza man, though. I plan on moving again, soon. I'm going to be moving from place to place, in order to keep myself hidden. You see, there are still a lot of people out there that would love to capture me because I was your "mistress" throughout everything. I sometimes wonder if you thought me as such._

_Each day, I not only think of you, but I dream of our time together. I remember that you were a kind and gentle lover, even if the world thought of you as the worst man to ever walk this planet. Sometimes you wouldn't be able to sleep at night, so I'd talk to you until you finally fell asleep. Every morning you would have to spend over five minutes to wake me up. I always threw Cheese-Kun at you, but you never stopped trying to get me to wake up. Later on in the day, I would find room to make fun of your hat. You know, I never did like that hate. I still hate it, in fact. I can see you either fuming or laughing at me right now for those comments. But, in complete honesty, my fondest memory is the one I have of our last conversation._

* * *

><p><em>I was just sitting on our bed, thinking of how your time on Earth was drawing to a close, when you knocked on the door and walked in. I didn't dare look up at you for some reason. You greeted me as you always did, "Hello, C.C."<em>

_I sighed, standing up and walking over to the book shelf, not wishing to say a word. I skimmed my fingers over the leather bindings of all the old books you kept. You walked up behind me and asked, "C.C., are you okay?"_

_I asked, "Are you sure about this?"_

_"What are you talking about?" You asked me, suprised._

_"The Zero Requiem." I asked the question that had been on my mind for the past two months, "Lelouch, when did you stop looking for alternitives?"_

_I could just tell that you froze, your eyes filled with shock from hearing those words coming out of my mouth. "When there were none left," was your simple reply._

_I just shook my head, keeping my back to you._

_"C.C., there's something you aren't saying. You know you don't have to pretend around me, anymore."_

_As my eyes began to water, I closed them tightly, doing my best to keep the tears from spilling. I didn't say a word to you. I used to be so guarded, so safe, so...C.C. When I gave up my mortal name, I gave up my emotions along with it in order to keep my heart safe, but you did something. You found out everything about me and forced me to open up, causing me to become less C.C. and more...human. I was always so good at keeping the tears inside, but you were forcing me to let go of them, something I hated to do. I used to be frozen, cold, and dead. But, you breathed life into me, causing all those blocked emotions to come back to life inside my unaging heart._

_You put a hand on my shoulder. "C.C., please say something. You can stop acting like nothing's wrong. I need you to tell me what you're truly thinking, right now. Stop holding back."_

_SMACK!_

_Your face snapped sharply to the side suddenly. You looked at me, your left cheek turning a bright shade of red. I was facing you now, my right hand raised as if I had just slapped someone. It helps that did, of course. You blinked at me, eyes wide as you saw the tears that were quickly filling up in my eyes. You weren't expecting me to snap like I did, and to be honest, I didn't either. But, since I was finally unleashing my emotions with nothing to hold them back, I was going all out._

_"You bastard..." I muttered silently. I looked up at you, my eyes meeting yours. What emotion mine bore, I don't know, but I could easily tell it shocked you. "You were supposed to be nothing more than my contractor, my accomplice; nothing more! But, you...you began to unveil me. You learned of who I truly am! You found out that my true wish wasn't to die. But, that's what you were supposed to do! I thought you would be the perfect contractor! You were bold, cold, indifferent, you were willing to do or kill anybody to complete you goal; even me! But, then you decided to meddle when your father was going to do it for you! You promised me that you'd make me smile! You showed me kindness and love! You made me fall in love with you! And now, you're just throwing your life away and leaving me alone, like I've always been! Is that what you want? Did you intead for it to end this way right from the start?"_

_Suddenly, I was drawn into a warm embrace. You held my head to you chest. I placed my hands on your chest, pushing slightly, hoping that you would let me go. But, to my suprise, you just held me closer. "Just tell me you hate me, Lelouch. Tell me that I'm a horrible witch and that I should never have given you the power of Geass. Just, stop lying to me! I can't take it anymore!"_

_This only caused you to hold me even tighter. "C.C., if you think that of yourself, then I must not have told you I love you or have told you how amazing you are enough. If you truly do think that I hate you, then I might as well kill myself right now."_

_I looked up at your face, my cheeks becoming soaked with tears. "L-Lelouch...?"_

_You didn't look at me as you said, "So, please, C.C., stop hating yourself. You don't deserve to live a life like that. I love you, but I can't stay with you anymore. I need to do this. Please, don't make this any harder than it already is."_

_As your words replayed over and over again in my mind, I buried my head into your chest. I wrapped my arms around you neck and allowed my tears to silently flow down my cheeks. Your left arm wrapped around my waist while your right hand stroked my hair. You let me cry to hearts contect that day. After a good ten minutes of silence, you cupped my cheek in your hand before kissing me tenderly. I kissed back, knowing that this would be our last kiss. My mind flashed back to when I kissed you at Babble Tower and you were given your memory back. I remembered how I never told you that I didn't NEED to kiss you and a small smile graced my lips against yours. Not long after that, there was a knock on the door._

_We broke apart slowly and you ordered whoever it was to come in. Jeremiah walked in, bowing slighly. "I apologize for interrupting, My Lord, but it's time to go."_

_You nodded curtly. "Very well, Jeremiah. You go on ahead. I'll catch up."_

_The man nodded before leaving. You looked at me, sadness in your eyes. You hugged me one last time before saying, "Good-bye...Ceceniah."_

_You released me before turning and walking out the door. When you were at the doorway, I looked down and said, "Good-bye, Lelouch." You gave no sign that you heard me as you left. I watched your retreating back as you walked up to death's door. When I could no longer see you, I smiled sadly and left to pray for your soul at the local church._

* * *

><p><em>Your favorite memory might be something else, but I treasure that one the most. You see, immortals don't really dream, we relive our memories. At times, they'll be slightly different, but it's always something to do with our memories. All year, they've had to do with our relationship.<em>

_When you think about it, our relationship was...bittersweet with a tragic ending. I hate being alone again, now. I wish that you had taken mine or Charles's Code before you died, but you never did. At times, I'll consider giving someone a Geass and waiting until it grows powerful enough for me to force my immortality upon them, so that I could be joined with you in C's World, but I know it's the wrong answer, so I don't do anything. I just sit at home all day, clutching Cheese-Kun and eating pizza. A horrible way to live, isn't it? I can just picture you shaking your head at me, telling me that I need to get a life outside of this house. But, you aren't here to do that anymore, are you?_

_As I sit here at my desk, a small smile makes it look as if I'm writing a sad love letter. Perhaps, I am. Even though it's been a year since I've seen your face, you are still my demon. No matter what happens, you will ALWAYS hold a place in my heart, and this is the undeniable truth. I miss you like crazy, but in due time I know I'll have to let go of the past. I've done it many times before, so I'll be able to do it again. I'm afriad that it'll take much longer this time. But, no matter how many years go by, no matter how many people leave me in the never ending flow of time, I will never be able to deny one thing. I love you, Lelouch. And that'll never change._

_Love,  
><em>_your immortal witch, Ceceniah._

**A/N: Wow, this is my longest one-shot. ^^ This was just going to be a story based on Lelouch's and C.C.'s final conversation. But, I ended up doing something else. I had a lot of trouble with this, at first, but then I got the idea of a letter and yeah. I spent a lot of time thinking, by the way. I realized the following:  
>1. I write best in third person, so all of my other stories are going to be in third person<br>2. I like to bring up points that were used in the real story line and adding my own twist on them because I adore the real story line, so I like adding it because it's so much fun  
>3. I love plot twists and cliff hangers when I'M writing them, but if someone else does it, I scream quite loudly in my head<br>4. Life gives me inspiration  
>5. My sister is a lot like Kallen, so I'm going to bash her a lot less (sad face)<br>6. I write my best stories when I'm listening to scene fitting music (I find the OSTs from Code Geass VERY helpful)  
>7. I've started to grow accustumed to using smarter language, words, and different sentence structures for C.C.<br>8. I like making lists  
>9. "What Have You Done?" is no doubt the worst story I have EVER written<br>10. "What Have You Done?" was just an expirement  
>11. This list is getting too long<br>12. I'm done with this list because it's too damn long  
>So, that's that. Also, I have something to say.<br>No matter how many people flame me, no matter how many people tell me I suck and that I should stop writing, I will ALWAYS write my stories and I will ALWAYS post them. I will allow anonymous reviews again once this is up, but I promise you, you can say whatever you want to me, and I will not allow it to bring me down. Some people write because they love to see people enjoy it, but I don't write for that. I write for an escape. My life is hell, and I find my haven here, in writing. When I write, I feel like I'm flying. When I read the reviews, I'm still up in the sky. When I read the flames I get for "What Have You Done?", I sigh, roll my eyes, ignore it, and keep on flying. NO ONE, and I mean, NO ONE, will ever bring me down. My dad tried to bring me down when I first told him I wanted to be an author, and I didn't go down. If my FATHER can't bring me down, then NONE OF YOU will ever be able to bring me down. NONE. OF. YOU. Also, if you flame people just to flame them, you really should stop. Not only is it immature and stupid, but it cnan be very hurtful to others. So, please, think before you post. ^^ *deep breath* Getting that out of my system felt really good. Lol. So, I'm going to respond to all the reviews I got from the last chapter of "What Have You Done?"  
>BrowneyedShamer: Thank you so much. I was reading Poison Study at the time and fell in love with the names of the poisons, so I snuck them in there. I was waiting for someone to notice where they came from. So, you get a free cookie.<br>Animelover351: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it so much, even if I did hate it.  
>name: Haha, alright. Everyone voted for "Showbiz", so your wish is my command. XD<br>nymphik13: Okay. ^^  
>renielle14: Thank you and you're welcome. ^^ I'm so glad I'm finally done writing "What Have You Done?". Haha.<br>Dgg: As you can tell, I deleted your review, but I just want you to know something. Thank you for your imput. If you think I have no sense of imagination, then fine. You have a right to your opinion. I have no right to try to change that. As to why "you wasted your time reading my horrible story", that's something you need to find out for yourself. Sadly, I'm not a mind reader or an oracle, so that's something you need to figure out for yourself. Even if you just skimmed over my story, I would like you to know that I'm very thankful to you for reading my story, even if you hated it. So, thank you.  
>Everyone else who read andor reviewed in previous chapters: Thank you so much for reading "What Have You Done?"! And thank you for reading "Letters To You"! I love you all so much, even if you do hate me and my stories! =D  
>P.S. If you're still reading this WAY too long AN, you win a free cookie of your choice. \(^.^)/  
>Please, review!<strong>


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